It's Not All Gravy

The Pitch

Poutine is arguably THE signature dish of the province of Quebec (is there an argument?).  Poutines across the land normally deliver; they're almost always good and sometimes reach perfection; be it on the classic, no-frills side or the more upscale, inventive kind.

I've rarely found a poutine disappointing, even at a university cafeteria or your random ski station lunch counter.  The right ingredients are widely available and the recipes have been perfected and streamlined over generations; be it the industrialized version or the homemade rendition, how can it go wrong?

So how was the one at Poutineville, the self-described "best poutine in Montreal and Quebec" (taken from their website)?  Today I visited the Shaughnessy Village, Bishop street location of this resto/bar chain with my kids to find out.  As teenagers, it's not easy to find things to do that we all enjoy; but their love for poutine made for a good excuse to take them out for lunch on this frigid Sunday.

tagged:  WEEKEND LUNCH

The Mood

I was invited to try Poutineville's Queen Mary location back in 2019; a visit with no imprint in my memory, which probably meant it was just "OK".  What I do recall is these places suggest a bar concept to go with their casse-croûte fare.

The interior is a hodge podge of wooden panels, kitschy art, memorabilia and a bookcase of serve-yourself card and board games.  Of course, it was too early in the day to either witness or partake in any drinking; instead, the room was rather quiet and empty save for a mom with her two kids and a table of college-aged youngsters.

tagged:  BRING THE KIDS

The Food

More than a poutine shop, the menu here reads like an extended version of Quebec diner fare.  Alongside a dozen world poutines and a dozen signature poutines sit burgers, subs, hot dogs, grilled cheese and other sandwiches.  If it all sounds heavy, wait until you hear about the Heart Attack; a whopping 15 pounds of poutine!

While the custom poutines with their simple, creative or whacky toppings sounded like fun, we took the safe route today.  If I judge a burger joint by its classic cheeseburger, a pizzeria by its margherita, the same goes for a poutine shack.  The only way to really get a sense of each component and how they fit together is without excess and distraction.

All three of us ordered classic poutines either as a main or a side to something else.  Not only is this not the "best" poutine, it was in fact sadly disappointing.  Cheese curds are cheese curds; there's not much to say about those.  The fries are a nice golden brown with a soft inside, but could have used a little more crisp on the outside.  The gravy is where they lost me.  It was completely flat and lacking in salt.

Apparently, it's vegan and gluten free; why am I not surprised?  Moving on to other – hopefully better – things, the hot dog was decent; but then again, how can you mess it up when nearly everything in it is store bought?  The coleslaw was too bitter; another letdown.  At least we took solace in a caramel milkshake, which had a good creamy/smooth consistency and moderately-sweet taste.

tagged:  NOT FOR THE FAINT-HEARTED

The Service

Our young bespectacled waitress – we had her all to ourselves at first – was courteous and friendly.  She had to go to the kitchen to answer a few "is it made with pork?" questions, which needed several minutes of wait for some reason.  Asides from that, it was all gravy (see what I did there?).

The Verdict

With 11 locations across Quebec and Ontario, Poutineville is clearly succeeding at what they do.  Their greasy-spoon-meets-dive-bar proposition is no doubt a draw for rowdy nights of heavy eating and drinking.  For the more discerning foodie, your money is better spent elsewhere, not excluding a random pataterie or highway stop.

Granted, we did take the safe route today with our order, so perhaps we missed out on some elaborate house specialties.  But if your main attraction is made of three ingredients, you should master all three.

tagged:  SUBPAR

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Price per person:  $17.45